I have always been a dormant volcano. Yes, I know I sound corny but bear with me. I don’t usually express my emotions to the fullest whenever something is bothering me. All my anger and frustrations are shoved into the back of my mind as I keep myself busy in order to not think about them. I do talk to my girlfriend about it but it doesn’t always completely help. The emotion is still there. Waiting for a minor annoyance to set me off.
When I do get mad over a little matter, it’s really difficult for me to get over it. I start thinking negative and dark thoughts that I won’t go into detail about because you might call me depressed (which I’m not). When I’m in that frame of mind, I stop doing anything important I need and want to do. Even playing video games is just put to a stop. I’d stay in my room all day doing nothing and loathing over every single detail I hate about my life.
I’ve been experiencing this almost everyday recently which explains the hiatus. My life even feels more difficult now because I rarely have any communication with my girlfriend due to her broken cellphone. I was always able to get some kind of comfort and solace whenever I text, call, and meet up with her but now, I’m just facing my own mental state all alone… and I hate the idea of that.